An Ode to Stan

Dear Stan,

I was complaining, again and several friends suggested I look into you. The Leachco Snoogle Total Body Pillow Deluxe. I was a stomach or back sleeper, and kept reading I should be sleeping on a side. I found myself tipping over, and winding up on my back. I would wake up in a panic, "my baby isn't getting blood flow!" and knew I needed to take action.

So I found you on Amazon, and bought the Organic version. I tried you out a few times, but between the Queen size bed, my belly, Steve, and the ever expanding George, there was just no room. I make-shifted pillows, between the legs, in front of me, and on my side but nothing was comfortable. Nothing was keeping me on my side. I would try to turn Steve into my personal Snoogle but he snores as loud as a bulldog.

You went on top of the dresser, sad, alone and knowing your talent was being wasted. I am sorry about this. You were right, I was wrong. A few weeks ago I brought you back, tried you out. Removed all the other pillows on the bed and you were like the softest, warmest, cushiest pillow in my life. You didn't bother Jane, you gave the perfect head/neck support and stayed between my legs, keeping me on my side. I rolled you in a ball and watched TV on you. You were my perfect reading buddy. And thus you were named Stan. As reliable as ever.

Thank you for being you.

Jennifer


Dear Stan,

I tried to tell the crazy lady of your awesome powers but she never listened to me. She's too lazy to do much with you during the day, when she and the fat man leave to give Vinney and I nap time so she leaves you in a circle on the bed. You are my new home. You are my everything. I never want to leave you.

George