At any rate, somehow, almost two months ago I now have a one year old. Which means it's been a year since I was pregnant, and a year since she was born, a year of being a family of three on one income, and a year of being a Mom. Which is - insane.
But along the way, I have learned a few things. For which I am semi-certain of. And with so many new Mom's out there I thought I would share. Granted, half of this is s#!% Shannon told me and the other half is what I learned on my own.
You can live on no sleep.
It's not *pretty* or *clean* to live on no sleep .. but it's livable.
You can talk about poop multiple times a day. This can actually be the sole correspondence with your significant other.
They cry. Sometimes there is nothing you can do about it.
You'll feel helpless, multiple times a day.
Start solids when they stare you down eating your dinner. They can handle it.
Start sippy cups and straws *early* .. it will help when you forget to bring milk to a restaurant and are forced to use what they have.
Put them to bed when they are still awake.
You may have thought you loved before, but nothing can ever compare to this feeling.
Don't bring the Elmo phone in the car.
Realize they're going to fall when they start walking. So far no one has called DCFS on me.
If your kid doesn't crawl or walk when others do, it's going to be okay. They all do eventually. When I walk down the street I don't see anyone on all fours.
"Attempt" to not compare your children to others, or judge other parenting skills. I said attempt.
Tell people to buy play clothes for your kid. No baby wears dresses that much.
Forget about the baseboards (this helps when you rent).
Never underestimate the power of their self-love when they are having a fit. (find a mirror)
Write in their baby book once a month. Make yourself.
Get them swimming, safely, as soon as you can.
If you cry when they get their first shots - its totally normal, bring your significant other to reassure you of this.
Your face is their favorite toy. For better, or for worse.
When you feel the walls caving in on you, get out of the house. Call a friend and tell them what is going on (pot, meet kettle).
If you really are feeling sad, know that it's normal, and find help. Find a doula.
Restore your sanity by getting together with girlfriends.
Nine months on, nine months off.
The kitten is not in fact, a stuffed animal. You know this, the kitten knows this, but the baby does not.
If they're crying in their crib, they are in fact alive. Go to the bathroom.
Happy Mother's Day to all the Mom's out there! Aka, Happy Winging it ...
Disclaimer: I have no idea what I am talking about.
3 comments:
I only take credit for all the s*@% that has been accurate in true (and mostly, I'm assuming, this is the part about not really needing that much sleep.) :) As I've always said, just follow your instincts and you'll be great! Jane is incredibly lucky to have you for a mom.
Great post! :) Happy Mother's Day Wohn!
Love it! Happy Mother's Day!
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